A Battle to the Finish

It had come down to this, the two men aligned on the broken plain, a gentle breeze kicking up swirls of dust.

On one end of the field stood the figure of Jim Hines. A tiny fire spider scrambling from shoulder to shoulder across his leather jacket. Four princesses flanked Jim and a bookish looking person stood behind him shrouded in shadow. Arrayed across the field behind Jim was at least a horde of goblins, possibly two hordes. One particularly runty goblin with glasses separated itself from the horde and came to stand in front of Jim.

On my side, my army was not nearly so great. A knight stood to my right, unholy power leaking between the plates of armor. A wizard stood nearby ready to unleash his magic on any who approached. I hope the dragon was equally to the goblin horde, but who could say how that would go?

“I will not let you so blithely take control,” I yelled across he battlefield.

“I’m not even sure what this is all about,” Jim yelled back. “Why are we here?”

“You know perfectly well, Hines,” I said. “Don’t play coy with me. There is a point where your innocence bleeds into arrogance. I know you seek to take the Wizard’s Library from my hands.”

At these words, the bookish person in the shadows perked up.

“No,” Jim said. “I–”

“Enough of your words, sir,” I bellowed. “We fight now.”

Before I could give the order to charge, a young boy appeared before me. He wore a tabard of a blue field with white book on it. In his hands he held a rolled-up scroll.

“A missive from the gods, Sir.” The young boy’s voice cracked as he said the words.

I unrolled the scroll and read the contents aloud.

You are receiving this email because you are a maintainer of the community wizardlibrary.

According to the results of the Owner Election for this community, jimhines has been designated as the owner of this community.

“Well, it seems the masses have spoken, Mr. Hines,” I said. “Take good care of the place.”

I reached into my pocket and dug out a set of keys attached to a fierce wolf keychain and tossed the set to the new owner.

Author: Joshua

Joshua is a writer of SFF, leaning more to the fantasy side of the genre. Travel the road with me as I tell the stories.

3 thoughts on “A Battle to the Finish”

  1. And I just wanted to comment quickly, lest anyone think this is serious. I merely found it amusing that there was some kind of election and it was turned over to Jim. I doubt either of us has even remotely thought of that community since it was initiated.

  2. For this dramatization alone, I would happily return the keys to the community to you, sir! :-)

    Though if that runty goblin were really on the field with me, he wouldn’t stand in front of me. He’d run up behind me and stab me in the back for everything I’ve put him through…

    I have no idea what was up with that LJ note. The first I knew of it was when I received that e-mail proclaiming me the victor. ???

    1. Glad you enjoyed the little story Jim. True, I might have mis-represented Jig.

      It’s funny that is was a surprise for you too. I suppose it probably went to the person who posted the most? No idea. At least you are still active on LJ.

      I probably should have closed it up long ago. So feel free to shut it down now.

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